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06/22/2012

Full Transcript of Interview with Jef

Here is the full transcript of the conference call interview with Jef!  He talks about this coming week's big revelation that Arie dated a producer who works on the show.  He also describes his feelings of L-O-V-E for Emily!  

Jef

Question:            So, historically on The Bachelor and The Bachelorette, the nice guy or girl doesn’t tend to go all the way.  So, do you think it’s possible for someone who’s nice like you to actually win?

 

Jef Holm:             Well, first of all, I appreciate you thinking I'm nice.  That’s very nice of you.  I think, yes, I definitely think so.  I think, you know, it – yes, The Bachelorette is an interesting thing.  And it takes awhile for, you know, mine and Emily’s relationship to get to the good point, I think, you know, and we started off slowly.  And, you know, we developed a really good friendship at first.  And I think as time goes on, you'll see that friendship turns into, you know, more of – more and more of a romance.  And I definitely think it’s possible for the – for a good guy to go all the way.  Yes.

 

Question:            Excellent.  And do you – it seems like you and Arie have developed a really good friendship.  Kind of more than the other guys have developed their own group.  Can you talk a little bit about your relationship with Arie and the other guys?

 

Jef Holm:             Yes, Arie and I became really good friends on the show.  He – we were completely different from any of the other guys we felt like.  And we became good friends.  And we hung out a lot.  And it was – it was different with us.  Like anytime he would come home from a date, we would I mean, as we were like, weren’t –it wasn’t weird to talk about it. 

 

                It wasn’t weird to – we didn’t have like a rivalry going or anything.  That we just became good friends.  And then we could talk about it openly.  And we tried to keep you know, we tried to keep our feelings for Emily out of it.  And just talk about as if – as if we were going out with different girls.  You know, I mean, we wanted to – we wanted to stay friends on the show and after the show. 

 

                And he’s kind of a free spirit just like I am, and doesn’t really show that a lot on the show.  You know, how much of a free spirit I am.  I am just kind of portrayed as like just the – just the nice guy.  But he and I – we're really similar.  And he’s a really good guy.  I really like Arie.

 

Jennifer Matarese:         Hi, so I was wondering, why did you play it so cool and take things so slow with Emily in the beginning.  Was that a strategy?  And did you feel like you had a lot of catching up to do against some of the other guys at, you know, at this point?

 

Jef Holm:             Yes, that's a really good question.  I get that question a lot.  And it’s kind of interesting.  I – when I first got to the house, I realized that every single one of the guys was just like going full steam ahead for Emily. 

 

                I mean, every one of the guys was just like anytime she even comes to the room they were just, like, jumping up, and giving her their seat, and, like, trying to get her a drink -- or trying to talk to her just like surrounding and swarming her --and, you know, that's not really how I am anyway with girls, especially in a situation like that. 

 

                Like, I wasn’t going to be just like up in front, you know, trying to like make her notice me.  And so, I wanted to be one of the guys who – or, and I guess I was the only guy who, you know, kind of played it cool.  And wanted her to know that there’s a – there’s a guy that's not completely, you know, trying to chase her like crazy.  I mean, I wanted to chase her for sure.  But I didn’t want to be like, you know, someone who is just out there trying to get her attention like crazy.

 

                And all the guys thought I was – all the guys thought I was crazy and that I was just blowing it.  And, you know, they didn’t – they didn’t realize that Emily and I were sharing some looks back and forth.  But, I knew I didn’t need to be like out in front jumping and trying to get her attention so much.

 

Jennifer Matarese:         Did you feel like you had to catch up to them at this point in the show?  Is that why you started like, OK, well I had better get kissing her?

 

Jef Holm:             I don't know if I really felt like I needed to catch up to them.  It was so early on.  And I was just trying to figure out – up until, you know, Bermuda when I didn’t kiss her on the beach twice.  It was just because I was still, to be honest with you, I was still trying to figure out like what I was doing there. 

 

                It’s a really – it’s a strange situation to be in.  And I – it’s definitely something that I wasn’t, you know, completely comfortable doing, dating a girl in those – in that situation.  So, I was just kind of trying to figure out what I was doing.  And I was nervous and still trying to – you know, figure it all out.  And then – and we had built like a really good friendship up to that point. 

 

                I just wasn’t really ready to take it to the next level because I didn’t – I didn’t really know.  You know, there were times when I – there were times when I wanted to go home.  And then when I hung out with Emily, you know, I wanted to stay more than anything and get to know her more.  Because she’s amazing.  But, it – but I was just trying to figure it out.  I didn’t really feel like I had to catch up to the other guys.

 

Question:            Great.  So, I know you just said you didn’t feel like you had much catching up to do.  But, do you think that taking things slow with Emily ultimately helped or hurt your relationship with her?  Because although it seemed like it grabbed her attention and kept her guessing, some viewers have argued you waiting to make the first move might have pushed her away a little bit. 

 

                Because she began questioning whether you even liked her?  And then it might have allowed her other relationships to develop faster.  You know what I mean?

 

Jef Holm:             Yes, I think some of her relationships did develop faster than ours.  You know, but I – if I could go back and redo it, I would do it the exact same way.  I wouldn’t change one single thing, because I made the move when I was ready to.  And it kept her guessing. 

 

                And I think it – I think it was kind of cool to make her wait.  You know, because all of the – like I said, all the other guys were just like chasing her.  And just like right out there in front.  And I was the one guy who was just like, you're going to have to – you're going to have to fight for me, too.  Like, I don’t want to be the only guy who’s pursuing you here.  I want you to pursue me.  And I want it to be like a mutual thing.  And, you know, if we – if we develop really, like a relationship with feelings for each other, then I want it to be both ways. 

 

Question:            Sure.  And you said you were present for the conversation in which Kalon referred to Ricki as baggage.  And you told Emily all about it after you had discovered the other guys shared the information with her during the group day.  However, if Emily wasn’t made aware of Kalon’s comment prior to your one on one date, would you have been the one to tell her about it?  And would you have waited until a later time?  Because I'm sure you'd worry that her reaction to the news might ruin the small amount of one on one time you finally got with her.

 

Jef Holm:             Right.  That’s a good question.  And I was – I was present when Kalon made that comment.  We were sitting on the couch in London.  And I just happened to walk in right as he said that.  And I asked him, you know, “Well, if you feel like Ricki's baggage, why wouldn’t you leave?”  And, you know, and he said that, you know, he felt like it was – his life back home was pretty boring.  And this was a cool adventure to be on. 

 

                And immediately as soon as I heard that, Doug and I went to the gym together.  And I told him what had happened.  And I wasn’t going on the group date obviously -- and I – because I had the next one on one date with her.  And so, I told Doug.  I was like, “Look, I think she needs to know.  And I think she needs to know immediately.”  And if, you know, if Doug didn’t want to tell her, I would – I would have definitely told her on my one on one date. 

 

                I felt like she needed to know something, you know, some information that's, that crucial.  And so, luckily Doug told her.  And, you know, I thought, I think Doug’s a really good guy for doing that -- and standing for up her.  But yes, I definitely would have told her on our next date.  The first opportunity I had for her to know, I wanted her to know.

 

Question:            OK, so wanted to get your thoughts.  I mean, on the previews for this upcoming Monday episode.  We see a little bit about, you know, reports saying that Arie actually dated one of the producers.  So, one, you know, just wanted to get your thoughts that what you and the guys thought about that whole thing when you first heard, and, you know, how you guys tried to comfort Emily.  And what you said to her when she found out.

 

Jef Holm:             That’s a good question.  I didn’t find out until after I had gotten home. 

 

Question:            Oh wow.

 

Jef Holm:             And it’s really interesting.  It’s – that's really weird to me.  Because I, you know, Arie and I developed a really good friendship.  And we communicated about, you know, everything.  And, you know, it’s so strange to me, because he would come back home to the hotel after one of his dates, and he would be like – we talked about it all the time. 

 

                And he’d be like, Emily just feels like there’s something that I'm – that I'm like hiding from her, or something that I'm holding back.  And I have no idea what it is.  And I was all – I mean had, obviously had no idea that he dated one of the producers.  So, I was just like, well what do you think it is?

 

                And he’s like, I have no idea.  I just – I just get the feeling that like she doesn’t trust me and that there’s something up.  And, you know, of course, once I got home and I figured that out, I was just like, well duh. 

 

Question:            Yes.  (Inaudible).  Sorry.

 

Jef Holm:             So, yes.  And so, it never came up one time.  And as soon as I found out I’ll, you know, obviously I was like – that’s obviously what it was that she felt like you were hiding because she found out.  And I know she didn’t address it immediately with him.  She kept trying to like get him to open up and talk about it.  And I – you know, you'll find out a lot more about it.  I think it’s a really shocking and really cool, interesting story. 

 

Question:            Now, did you guys sense that she was upset about something, you know, in general or, because, since you guys really being and know exactly what.  Did you guys know something was bothering her that night?

 

Jef Holm:             No, I – when I hung out with Emily, every time it was just about us.  We never really got into anything about the other guys.  And I actually will trust you once in awhile.  Just because like I know it’s a weird situation with her.  And for her, and so I would want to – I wanted to talk to her about all the – all the other guys.  And I'm not like a – I mean, obviously Arie and I talked about it and stuff every night. 

 

                And so, I'm not like a jealous guy.  And I don’t – I don’t think Arie is either.  And so I wanted to know stories about the other guys and how her relationships were and stuff like that, and her to open up about it.  But, when we hung out for the most part it was just we focused on us.  And we focused on developing a relationship between the two of us.  And it turned into a pretty cool thing.

 

Question:            I was wondering.  Obviously, you know, at this point, it’s.  There’s multiple people left.  And multiple people have feelings for her.  And I'm wondering if you – if you thought, if it can’t be me, I think this guy would be her best choice?

 

Jef Holm:             Yes.

 

Question:            Is it?  Is there someone you would choose for her that you think that they see.  And if it’s not me, then I wanted to.  I think this guy should be the one to step in because he fits her the best, or other than me.

 

Jef Holm:             Yes.  I got to know all the guys really well.  And that’s a tough – that's a tough question to answer.  Because I don’t know.  I mean, I was crazy about Emily.  And it’s hard to picture someone you're crazy about being with somebody else, especially, you know, some of your friends.

 

                And, I don’t – I don’t know.  That’s a tough question.  I think there were some amazing guys there.  And they did some – they did a great job getting some – getting some great guys.  Well, I think Arie, I think the world of Arie.  I think he’s a great guy.  Sean is so nice.  And, you know, and really faithful and just a really nice, genuine guy.  Chris and Doug; I mean, there’s just so many different personalities.  And I think the biggest key would be how the guys’ personality meshes with Emily’s.  And I didn’t really get to see a lot of – I didn’t get to see them interact, you know, personally.

 

                Except just when I watch it on the show.  And so, I don't know, that's a tough question to answer.  You know, if I could choose one for Emily.  All this said, I would want to choose myself, you know, but.  There’s – there are some great guys (on it).

 

Question:            Do you think that she – I mean, because obviously you guys had all sort of agreed that Ryan was not either there for the right reasons or not the right choice for her.  Or too cocky; I mean, there was a lot of stuff thrown around about Ryan this week.  But, do you think that now that he’s gone, that everybody else is there for the right reasons?  That everybody is ready to be a step dad?  That everybody is ready to get married?

 

Jef Holm:             That’s a good question.  I think Ryan made me laugh.  You know, Ryan, he’s...and not because he’s funny…but just because he’s so.  He’s crazy and he’s just – he continually digs himself a hole over, and over, and over.  And I think he was there for the wrong reasons, 100 percent.  And now that he’s gone, I think it’s kind of – I think everyone there now is there for the right reasons.  And, you know, everyone has different personalities.  And everybody says they’re there for the right reasons.  And I hope they are.  And there’s a – there’s a big surprise elimination this week.  You know, and it’s kind of a mystery.  You know, it would be interesting.  You guys will have to watch and see.  It’s crazy, but yes, I think all the guys there that are left now are there for the right reasons.

 

Question:            Could you give us a sort of a tease as to what might happen for you at the next stop?  I mean, do you?  You know, can you talk about do you get a date or, you know, what do you do?  Or, is it great, blah-blah-blah?

 

Jef Holm:             I, as you know, I got a date in London.  And so my time isn’t really up for another date.  But, you know, it’s all up to Emily.  And she gets to choose people who she has the most fun with or the biggest connection with.  And so, this next week, Emily and I do get to spend some time together.  And it’s a – it’s a really cool – this is a huge changing pivotal moment in our relationship.  And you'll have to tune in and watch.

 

Question:            I just have a question.  You've mentioned that you were close to Arie out of the guys.  Who do you think you were least close to and why was that?

 

Jef Holm:             Who was I least close to?  Probably Ryan; he – I think we were probably the least.  He probably didn’t think that we were not that close.  You know, he just thinks that everybody loves him and everyone is team Ryan.  But I would just listen to him.  And, you know, he thought we were good friends.  And I think he thought everybody was his close friend.  But I think it was so hard to listen to and talk about his chemistry and relationship with Emily just because I didn’t see it.  I mean, it was just – it was just unclear to me why he was still around, you know, at this point.  And – but, I think he makes really good and funny TV.

 

Question:            And how do you feel about these rumors that you did get the final rose and that you are the winner?  Is it – is it hard to, I guess keep your mouth shut sort of?  And not say anything, or smile, or have any sort of expression about you winning?

 

Jef Holm:             I'm flattered that people think that's it me.  I think that's – I think that's cool, you know.  And I definitely developed strong feelings for Emily.  But as for, you know, as for where I'm at right now and my feelings for her.  I still – I still am crazy about her.  But, as for, you know, what happens you’ll have to tune in to find out.

 

Question:            In some of the previous conference calls we've had with some of the eliminated bachelors.  Nobody is still on the show.  They mentioned that – and we have attracted to you for your financial stability.  But, I haven’t really seen too many conversations between the two of you, or any for that matter that revolve money.  Have you had anything like that – that hasn’t aired on television?  And, or, do you think she is attracted to you for your personality, which is what comes across on camera?

 

Jef Holm:             I think, I know for a fact that it’s 100 percent our chemistry together.  That’s why she’s attracted to me.  And we’ve – we had never had one time and never one time on the show actually at all period ever talked about financial things, or money, or anything like that.  And so, and she actually mentioned to me one time on, I think it was.  I can’t remember.  I can’t remember when it was.  I think it – I think it’s coming up in our next stop. 

 

                I think she mentioned to me it might be on – I'm not sure if it’s on camera or not.  But she actually mentioned that she thought I still lived at home.  I mean, and so she had no idea that I like.  She has no idea anything about my financial status.  And she never did.  And I never knew anything about her.  And it was just completely, you know, two people getting to know each other.  And finding out if they like each other.

 

Question:            Yes, that's what I thought.  And also on the first episode you made your introduction by a skateboard.  So, I know you're still a child at heart.  Do you think that you could relate well to Ricki if you do get the chance to meet her?  Perhaps in a later episode, you already have met her?

 

Jef Holm:             At this point, up until this point, I would love the chance to get to meet Ricki.  And I am a child at heart.  And I would – you know, I would love to hang out with her.  And I mentioned to Emily a lot of times, you know, I want to – I want to skateboard with Ricki.  And play soccer with her because I grew up playing soccer. 

 

                And I know Emily mentioned that she had played soccer.  And yes, I don't know, I just like I think it’s something that Emily and I connected over is Ricki.  And I didn’t see her having a child as a bad thing.  Like even for one second ever in my mind; and all I thought about was you know, hanging out with Ricki if I ever got the chance.  And playing with her. 

 

                And so, yes, I think – I think that helped our relationship.  Thinking about being able to spend time with Ricki if that ever happened.

 

Question:            You – we, obviously we've all seen that you've got this connection with Emily.  But did you have any idea of what stage the other guys’ relationships were at with her when you were in the show?

 

Jef Holm:             Yes, pretty much all of the guys except Sean.  We would come back from the dates, and we would all talk about it.  And we’d all, it was kind of just like a guessing game.  We’d all ask questions and try to figure out, you know, what happened on the date?  And if they kissed or if they developed like a good chemistry?  Or what kind of happened? 

 

                And, all of the guys except Sean would talk about it.  And Sean was just – he was this locked vault.  He just would never talk about anything that happened on, you know, his date with Emily or anything.  And, you know, especially Arie and I, we would – we would talk about everything that happened on our date.  Just because we weren’t jealous of each other.  Or, you know, or it’s competing.  We didn’t see it as competing at all and so, yes. 

 

Question:            OK.  And I don't know if you've been watching the show.  But, it is strange seeing Emily kissing other guys?  And being on dates with other guys so over – as around the same time that you were doing those things?

 

Jef Holm:             You know, I’ve hardly been watching it.  So, I've – I did get a chance to watch.  Last night I watched this last episode in Croatia.  And yes, to be honest, it’s a little – it’s a little hard to watch this.  Because, you know, I completely felt for everyone. 

 

                And I didn’t have.  I didn’t really know what was going on, you know, on her – on her dates with the other guys.  And it’s definitely hard to watch that you care about or, you know, fell in love with.  Watch – you watch them kiss other guys.  For sure that's difficult.  And that's kind of – I think that's normal.

 

Question:            Hi, Jef, so nice to talk to you today.  I just want to ask.  At this point in the journey, who did you see as your biggest competition?  You had to have had some sort of like jealousy for other guys at this point.

 

Jef Holm:             Up to this point, I mean, I  – like I said, I became good, really good friends with Arie.  And I knew he’s a – he was a great guy.  And I had no idea about the whole, him dating a producer thing.  And so, up to this point I thought.  I knew Arie had a really strong connection with Emily.  And so, I wouldn’t see it as competition. 

 

                Because I honestly; I mean, I think if you love somebody, you want them to be happy.  You know, and I didn’t see Emily and Arie as a bad thing.  You know, if they did – if they did work out; or Emily and Sean.  I think – I think Arie and Sean were probably the two that I knew had really big connections with Emily.  And Sean because I didn’t know anything.  I mean, all I knew is that it was good.  And he was still around and getting (roses) because he wouldn’t talk about his dates.  And so, and it was just interesting.  So, I would probably say Arie and Sean.

 

Question:            OK.  And if you in fact win.  And, you know, if she moved across the country with Ricki.  Are you going to be able to like take time away?  Because I know you own a company.  And take time away from your company and spend time with Emily and Ricki?  And what kind of dad do you think you're going to be?

 

Jef Holm:             I can’t wait to be a dad.  And I can’t wait to, you know, to spend time with my kids.  And to have a family.  And, you know, if it’s with Emily, great.  And if it’s not, then I’ll – you know, I can’t wait to have a family some day.  And no matter who it is that I can definitely take time off from work.  And I want to be that type of dad who is just fun.  And hangs out with my kids and plays with them.  And we travel together.  And I know – I know Emily’s the same way.  And that's something that we had in common, you know. 

 

                She’s a great mom.  She’s one of the most amazing people I've ever met.  And she’s so patient, and loving.  And I mean, she’s seriously one of the most amazing people in the world.  And, you know, I have really strong feelings for her.  And I could – I could definitely at this point in Croatia and moving onto the next episode in Prague.  I could definitely see myself fitting into the role of being a father to Ricki and a husband to Emily.

 

Question:            I first want to discuss your infamous hair.  Obviously, you look different than the other contestants on the show.  You have like a little bit of style.  You know, it’s a clean cut.  Have you always had this hairdo?  Like where did this evolve from?

 

Jef Holm:             No, why are you laughing when we talk about my hair?

 

Question:            Because I think it’s a bit.  And everyone’s talking about it.  That’s like – it’s like the cute new style.

 

Jef Holm:             Well, thanks, finally someone talks about my hair, you know.  No, I haven't always had this hairdo.  I actually, when I was approached to come on the show, I had really long hair.

 

Question:            Really?

 

Jef Holm:             I had it (inaudible) when I (went) (inaudible).  When I had it in for – when I went in for testing, I had it all back in like a big ponytail.  And it was really long down to my shoulders.  And I think they kind of wanted me to keep that like bad boy image because I am, like, misunderstood in that way. 

 

                Like, I own my own business.  And I'm, like, I come from a really conservative family.  And yet I have like, you know, tattoos and long hair.  And you wouldn’t think that I was like – you wouldn’t think that was nice or that I would develop a relationship or chemistry with Emily like I did because I was nice, you know. 

 

                And so, no, I didn’t always have my hair like that.  I just – I cut probably three weeks before I went on the show.  And I wanted to – yes, and to be honest with you, I kind of cut it because of Emily.  Like, I didn’t know.  I didn’t watch her season.  And I didn’t know hardly anything about her except what my sisters told me. 

 

                And, you know, she seems like a – like a southern bell who is really conservative.  And I didn’t want to go on there looking like you know, I didn’t want like my image to be – to be the demise of me.  I didn’t want to go home the first night just because of the way I looked.  And I wanted her to really get to know me.  And so, I felt like, you know, my personality would come out the best if I – if I looked like that.  You know, and I like cut my hair a little bit shorter.

 

Question:            We sort of preempted my next question which was, you know, judging that or considering the fact Emily decided upon Brad on the last (inaudible).  He’s sort of the traditional like Texan.  You know, strapping cowboy kind of dude.  Did you think that she would go for you?  Like, did you?  You know, you got sort of more the skateboard hipster thing vibe going on.  Did you think you had a chance with her?

 

Jef Holm:             Yes, I did.  I mean, it was and I didn’t know at first.  Like the first night that I met her, I had no idea.  I mean, honestly it’s like a blur to me.  We sat there and we got to know each other a little bit.  And we talked for, you know, 20 or 30 minutes.  And I could tell that there was something. 

 

                And so, as soon as we got to know each other a little bit more.  And then we finally got to go on a one on one date.  I felt like we had something really special.  And I felt like it could work out between us.  And yes, I think – I think she kind of dug that I was way different than the guys.  And not only the guys in the house but anyone that she’s ever dated, I think.  You know, and I think she – we had a lot of fun together.  And, yes, she is – she is so much fun.  And...

 

Question:            On last week’s conference call, Arie actually kind of flipped.  And when asked if he would be interested in being the next bachelor, he said, “My fiancé wouldn’t be happy with that.”  I know you're very good friends with him.  Do you have any reaction to the notion that he’s engaged?  Of course, he didn’t specify if it was to Emily or not to Emily.  Just that he may be engaged to someone.

 

Jef Holm:             I don't know if he’s engaged or not.  If he is, that's awesome.  And I'm pretty confident that he’ll invite me to the wedding, I hope.  So, but I don't know that I'm.  I didn’t.  I am not sure if he is.  And if he is, you know, congratulations to him.

 

Question:            And that led me to a quick follow-up question.  If he is engaged to Emily, would you be comfortable attending that wedding?  Possibly being in the wedding party since you are close friends?

 

Jef Holm:             Man, that's a touch question actually.  I don’t – I don't know if I –  I don't know if – I don’t.  I know for a fact it wouldn’t be awkward between Arie and I if I was invited to the – to the wedding.  But, I would worry about if it would be OK with Emily if I was there. 

 

                You know, because we had something completely different than anything she had – anything she had with any of the other guys.  And it was really special.  But, I would want to be there, you know, because I love and care about Emily.  And I love and care about Arie.  I think he’s great.  So, I would hope that I would be invited.

 

Question:            And lastly, you mentioned that you cut your hair to try to fit the mold of what you thought Emily might want.  But, were you being true to yourself?  Would you ever want to go back to your old image and hope that Emily still – like, do you (prefer) who you were regardless of what you were portraying on the outside?

 

Jef Holm:             I think who I was portraying on the outside was totally.  I mean, if you – if you noticed.  I mean, it’s completely different than any of the other guys.  I'm kind of a weirdo.  I'm kind of like, I'm definitely, you know, different than any of the other guys on the show.  And so I think just because I cut my hair – I mean, I didn’t try.  I wasn’t by any means trying to fit a mold of what I thought she would like. 

 

                I was still trying to be true to myself.  I just wanted to have shorter hair.  Still different, it was still, you know, crazy.  But yes, to answer your question, I still want to grow my hair out again.  And, I, yes, I mean, that's just me, you know.  I don’t – I don’t really have one hair style that I stick to.  I change it up a lot.  And just hang out and be me.

 

Question:            So, obviously, I know that you can’t confirm if you win or not.  But let’s say you don’t.  And let’s say you are single right now.  Would you consider being the next bachelor?

 

Jef Holm:             Would I consider being the next bachelor?  Probably not.

 

Question:            You wouldn’t?

 

Jef Holm:             No, I wouldn’t.  I'm kind of done with the whole dating on TV thing.  You know, I mean, it was – it was a different situation for me.  And I'm really glad I went through it.  Because I learned a lot about myself.  And I met an amazing person.  One of, I mean, like I said, one of the most amazing people I’ve ever met.  But, yes, I don’t think that I ever considered being the bachelor.

 

Question:            And who –how did you get on the show?  Did your friend sign you up or did you sign up yourself?

 

Jef Holm:             That’s a – that's an interesting story.  My sister-in-law submitted an application for me without me knowing.  And so, I got a call from casting.  And I had no idea what they were talking about.  They were like, we received your application.  And I was like, no, you didn’t.  I think you have the wrong guy. 

 

                And so we ended – we ended up talking.  And I kept getting calls back from casting.  And they were just like we want to meet you.  We want to see pictures.  We want to see a video.  And I just – I was really hesitant to even send them anything.  Because I'm a really – I come from a really private family.  I'm really private about my life.  And I didn’t want to, you know, go out on a dating TV show as I saw it, you know. 

 

                And then I – let me see, what happened, then.  I just – I sent in a video after a long time of them talking me into it.  And then, I went out to California and met them.  And they said that they wanted to put me all the way through.  And I was still really hesitant to go on.  And then as soon as I – I find out it was Emily and I think the end of January, the first of February.  And that's when I committed to do the show is when I found out it was her.

 

Question:            So, if Emily didn’t eliminate Ryan during her one on one date with him, would you have kind of stepped up to the plate and warned Emily about his personality?  And the comments that he rubbed all you guys the wrong way.  Like, would you have tried to convince her that Ryan wasn’t the guy for her?  Or, would you have waited to let her figure that out on her own?

 

Jef Holm:             I would have waited to let her figure that on her own because if she – if he would have said something or done something that was, you know, inappropriate or derogatory towards her or something that, you know, was just – was just bad.  That I felt like she needed to know about.  I would definitely step up to the plate and tell her.  I mean, I wasn’t afraid to say anything to her.  Or to like give her any bad news about the guy, like bad guys. 

 

                I wasn’t necessarily trying to throw any of the guys under the bus.  But, I wanted – I mean, I wanted her to know what was happening in the house.  Because she, you know, she wasn’t told anything unless it came from one of the guys.  And so, I would have told her.  But, I always wondered that, too.  I always wondered why when she would be filled in on how Ryan really was? 

 

                And I worried that he would care really hard.  Because he was – he was really good.  He was a really good salesman.  And I thought that she was kind of blind to it at first.  And then, when she came and picked up Ryan for her date in Croatia, she looked over at me one time when he was like this date’s going to be fun.  And she looked over at me, and just gave me this smile like, yes, right, this date’s not going to be fun for you buddy. 

 

                And so, I kind of knew right then.  It was weird.  It was just – it was just a look she gave me that I kind of knew that she was, you know, she wasn’t being fooled by any of his tricks.

 

Question:            OK, sure.  And there’s been a lot of discussion in the house amongst the Bachelors about how some of the guys are too young and immature to take on the responsibility of being a husband and stepfather.  Although, they might believe they're ready. 

 

                Did you actually ever take any heat from the guys about being young and immature?  If so, what was said?  And I guess, if not, what side did you take in that argument?  Did you think age in the house was indicative of how ready a guy was to step into a father role?

 

Jef Holm:             That’s a good question.  I never took, you know, any flack by – from being about being too young or too immature too wild or funny or anything.  And that's definitely how I was portrayed in the house, too.  Or, that's how I was in the house was just the young, funny, you know, happy dude.  Who would just talk to all the guys and hang out with them.  And so, it’s kind of weird that I didn’t.  You know, I wasn’t talked to like that or none of the guys said that I was too young or anything like that. 

 

                But, I would side with – I would side with Chris in that argument.  That, you know, although age does matter because you learn and you grow as you get older I don’t think anyone in the house was too young.  You know, I think all the guys there were chosen because they could possibly see themselves as being a father.  You know, maybe minus Kalon, I think all the guys could have stepped up and been a really good father.

 

Question:            OK.  And during your one on one day with Emily, you said if Ricki was going to be compared to any baggage, it should be an expensive (Chloe) handbag.  And then Emily went off on a tangent about vintage Louis Vuitton and whatnot.  And so some viewers are wondering how you know so much about designer bags?  And so, my question is where did that knowledge come from?

 

Jef Holm:             You know, I'm really into fashion.  And I've – I have three sisters and a mom.  And they are really into shopping.  And I'm 27.  I've dated a lot of girls with – some of them with expensive tastes.  And I don’t really know where it comes from.  I guess just being around and hanging out with my sisters, and girlfriends.  And, you know, shopping, and hanging out, and having good taste, and knowing fashion I guess.  I don’t really know.

 

Question:            All right, fair enough.  And Emily has asked mostly all the guys how many kids they see themselves having.  Except we haven’t seen you answer that I don’t think.  So, how many kids would you like?  And would you be willing to have a van full of kids as Emily had suggested she wants?

 

Jef Holm:             I would definitely be willing.  I want – I want a lot of kids.  And as for the number or, you know, would Emily and I discuss about that.  It does come up.  And you'll get to see.  You'll get to see us talk about it.  And it’s really cool.  You know, one of our – one of our conversations coming up really soon is all about that.  And I just kind of drill her with questions about family.  And then she turns it on me.  And so, it’s really cool.  We start to communicate a lot more in our relationships.  Our relationship takes us a really big turn this next – this next episode.  So, tune in and find out.  It’s really cool.

 

Question:            Awesome.  And my last question for you, Jef – you've been on The Bachelorette.  Has the response been mostly positive?  Have you come across any negativity?  And I guess, how do you think the show will affect your personal and professional goals?

 

Jef Holm:             That’s a good question.  I've had 99.9 percent positive response since being home.  And it’s been interesting.  Like it’s really cool.  And I think people who really know me, or have like cared to, you know, find out about what I do professionally.  Or find out about my family life or my private life.  Like, I think they know what type of guy I am.  And they're not trying to make up stories or anything like that. 

 

                And 99 percent of the stuff that has come out has been true, and, you know, really good.  And it portrays me in a – in an honest, true good light.  And there’s been a couple of bad things, you know, that people have twisted.  Like, you know, talking about a chair, like my company how we – how we build wells in other countries for people talk about how I use that to pick up girls or something like that. 

 

                I mean, the stupid stuff.  Like I feel like the bad stuff that has come out about me.  Like they've had to really stretch and really try to come out with weird, stupid things about me.  I mean, it’s funny to see how hard they're trying to twist things in my life.

 

Question:            I just had a quick question.  You keep saying how private and conservative your family is.  And I guess from reading up on you a little bit it says that – I read that you're half Mormon.  Can you – can you go into that a little bit?

 

Jef Holm:             Yes, I'm not half Mormon.  I was raised – I was raised Mormon.  And my family is still Mormon.  My parents are serving in a Mormon mission as Mission presidents in South Carolina.  And I was raised with the standards of Mormonism in the church.  (Inaudible)... 

 

Question:            Sorry, you're breaking up a little bit.

 

Jef Holm:             That’s OK.  Can you hear me better now?

 

Question:            Yes.

 

Jef Holm:             OK.  Yes, I was just saying I'm not half Mormon.  I was raised Mormon.  And my family is still Mormon.  And my parents raised me with the standards of the church and the Mormon Church and everything.  And I'm just not practicing right now.  I'm still, you know, really – I mean, faith is something that's a huge priority on my list and in my life.  And I'm really active, you know, in church and everything.  I'm just not active Mormon.

 

Question:            OK.  And then you mentioned that you and Doug went to the gym like on your spare time.  Can you talk about other stuff you guys did when you weren’t like on dates or anything?

 

Jef Holm:             Yes.  When we weren’t on dates, we were mostly in the house being filmed.  And talking about Emily.  I mean, we were talk – and what's weird is at first I thought that would be so weird.  I thought being stuck in a house talking about a girl the whole time sounded so strange.  And talking, especially talking about one girl that we were all dating. 

 

                But, as time goes on, and we start to develop relationships.  And all of the other guys too; I mean, that's what we want to talk about.  And it’s weird to sit there and think that it got to that point.  But it definitely did.  And we would – we would sit there when we went on a date with Emily.  And we would talk about her.  And we’d talk about, you know, why we thought we’d be the best for her. 

 

                Or, you know, we’d talk about what she was like when we were with her.  Or, we would talk about, you know, the possibility of being a step dad.  And we’d talk about what we did at home.  I mean, it was mostly just like talking and hanging out.  And once in awhile, we’d get to go to the gym and do stuff like that.  It was just, yes, that was what we did.

 

Question:            My first question is can you tell us a little bit – a little bit about your first kiss?  Do you remember it?

 

Jef Holm:             I definitely remember it.  It was in London.  And I wanted to kiss Emily so bad and didn’t do it.

 

Question:            No, I mean, your first kiss, ever.

 

Jef Holm:             I thought you were talking about, OK, sorry.

 

Question:            No, yes, sorry.

 

Jef Holm:             I was like, yes, I definitely remember that.  My first kiss, ever; I don’t think I remember my first kiss ever.  I don't know, I think I was probably like 15 or 16.  And I was living in St. George.  And I can’t.  I know who I was with, but I can’t remember where, and what, or.  I don't know.  Do you have another question?

 

Question:            I guess you can’t compare that to your kiss with Emily then?

 

Jef Holm:             Yes, I can’t really, I mean, my first kiss with Emily was the most anticipated kiss.  And the best kiss of my life by far.  I mean, the place – the placement or like the setting and the surroundings and the girl.  And like our chemistry and everything was perfect.  And it was all about timing.  You know, our first kiss was all about timing.  And I'm really glad and I wouldn’t have it any other way than to wait for it like we did.  Because it made us both want. 

 

                You know, and I was trying to figure my situation out (from the show).  And she really wanted me to kiss her.  And when it happened it was awesome.  And it was the right timing.  And then our relationship just started to blossom after that.

 

Question:            So, if you in fact do end up with Emily.  And ten years from now Ricki comes to you for advice about her first kiss.  How would you handle that situation and what would you say to her?

 

Jef Holm:             If Ricki came to me for advice about her first kiss?

 

Question:            Yes, in like ten years, if you're married with Emily.

 

Jef Holm:             If Ricki came to me and asked for my advice about a first kiss, I would say you know, I would say the same thing that I just told you.  I would say make sure that the time is right.  And make sure that you – make sure that you really like him.  And make sure that – I’d want to meet him probably.  And I would hope I – hope I could. 

 

                I don't know, though, I think.  I think if she’s anything like Emily, then she has an amazing head on her shoulders.  And she’s going to – she’s going to know when the time is right.  And yes, if she’s anything like Emily, then she’s an amazing girl.

 

Question:            My last question.  Are you going to be one of those type of fathers that's waiting by the door with a shotgun?

 

Jef Holm:             No.  I'm going to be waiting by the door with two skateboards.  We’ll go hang out together, and skate, and get to know each other instead of intimidating him with a shotgun.

 

Question:            Hey, I just actually wanted to follow-up.  You keep saying that Emily is amazing.  And that she, you know, finding out it was her was one of the reasons you got excited about doing the show.  So, what is it about her a little more explicitly?  Why she’s amazing?

 

Jef Holm:             Emily is amazing because she is so funny.  She – I don’t think it shows.  On the show it doesn’t show how sarcastic, and how dry, and how funny she is, and sassy.  I know that she’d be on this next episode.  And when I get a chance to get to talking, I know she talks a lot about how embarrassed she is about the language she used when she kicked Kalon off the show.  But I think that’s cool.

 

                And that's one of the reasons why I'm so attracted to her.  Because she’s herself.  Not because, I mean, I care about a girl who swears or kicks guys out.  I mean, I just – I just love how true she is to herself.  And she doesn’t care if there’s cameras on her.  Or who’s watching.  She is – she is herself.  And she’s sassy when she needs to or when she wants to be.  And she’s really funny; I mean, and she’s gorgeous.  And she is really – she is really good in difficult situations.  She’s really composed.  And I was really surprised by that. 

 

                I mean, I had no idea how well spoken she was.  And how smart she is.  She’s really witty.  And yes, I mean, all of those things.  She’s really faithful.  And she’s a really good mom.  And you can tell, she talks about Ricki all the time.  And that's – then, it’s really important to me.  And all of those things that I just talked about are really important to me.  And then, she’s – she honestly is.  She’s the most amazing girl I've ever met so far.

 

I hope you enjoyed his looong interview!  

 

Hugs, Kisses & Roses,
Jennifer Matarese 

 

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